The MOOD Podcast

The Brutal Truth About Wedding Photography: Gigi de Manio, EO81

• Matt Jacob

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What does it take to capture the most important images of the biggest day of peoples lives?

Gigi de Manio is an acclaimed wedding photographer renowned for her ability to capture raw, emotional, and timeless moments. With a background in psychology, she brings a deep understanding of human connection to her work, ensuring every image tells a meaningful story. The discussion highlights the emotional complexities of wedding photography, the significance of pre-production, and the empowering nature of community support among creatives. Over her 25-year career, Gigi has established herself in the luxury wedding market, working with high-profile clients and event planners worldwide. She is also the author of Silver: Moments into Memories, a retrospective of her career in wedding photography.

What we discussed:

  • The journey from psychology to photography. 
  • Emphasis on emotional connection with subjects. 
  • Importance of pre-production and understanding clients. 
  • Challenges in the age of social media. 
  • Community support and networking among photographers. 
  • Continuous learning and evolving as an artist. 
  • Future aspirations and desire for meaningful storytelling.


Find Gigi de Manio's work on her channels:
Website: www.demaniophotography.com
Instagram: @gigidemanio
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Matt Jacob:

Welcome to the Mood Podcast. I'm covering the art of conversation one frame at a time. I'm your host, matt Jacob, and thank you for joining me in today's conversation. In this episode, I'm joined by Gigi DiManeo, a photographer celebrated for her unparalleled ability to capture the essence of weddings and family moments. From her beginnings as a psychology major, discovering photography in a dark room, to becoming a master of the decisive moment, gigi has honed a career that fuses artistry with human connection. She approaches each wedding with fresh eyes, treating it as a unique story, and brings a thoughtful, almost poetic attention to detail that elevates her work beyond mere documentation. We discuss her unexpected entry into photography and the transformative power of capturing moments that tell stories. Gigi shares insights on finding beauty in chaos, navigating the challenges of wedding photography and how her background in psychology informs her empathetic approach. We also explore deeper themes, like the art of quiet observation, balancing creativity with client expectations and the philosophies that guide her process. So now I bring you Gigi DiManeo. Well, thank you so much for A being patient, but joining me today.

Gigi de Manio:

Your work is stunning. Oh my God, god, I just got lost in your images. I I am so blown away by your work, truly oh, that's, and um so much you know I'm.

Gigi de Manio:

I don't know if I should start now, but I just wanted to say that. Um, yeah, I'm a wedding photographer, but your, your work is so moving and I find myself getting lost in your images and wanting to take what I see in your work and your inspiration and the emotion you capture. I was like God, can I just do that in my work? I'm shooting an entirely different subject, but what you capture is what I want to bring to my work. I just find it beautiful, it's really beautiful.

Matt Jacob:

Very sweet, thank you, and arguably you do. We all do things in different ways and we're going to I have questions about that because I have so much respect for you and your incredible work so we could spend an hour just giving each other platitudes and then everyone would be happy. You're amazing. No, you're amazing. Thank you very much. It's really nice and that's the pleasure of podcasting. We get to learn from each other and, for me, on a selfish aspect, I get to, you know, learn from loads of people and infuse and be inspired in many different ways in my own work with with the work of all you guys out there. So, um, I do wish the photography community was a little bit closer in that respect.

Gigi de Manio:

I think with the rise of social media, it gets a little bit competitive, a lot of time or a little bit envious of you know, he's got more followers than me, kind of thing he's got more work than me, right, but yeah that I just have to step back from it and just take a break, because you can still get carried away with it and just you know the FOMO, or just like the envy of like, ah, why can I get that wedding? Or you know I worked with that planner, how come I'm not getting that one? And yeah it's. You can drive yourself crazy and it can be a total self-esteem meltdown. Or you know it's just like you have to manage that.

Matt Jacob:

It's hard yeah, it's an energy. It's an energy that you have to try and harness, and in the, in a positive way. Right, there's something going. So I totally know what you mean and, um, I I stay off social media as much as possible because of that yeah I actually found a new artist on instagram about a week ago and I was just blown away.

Matt Jacob:

I just got lost in for hours in his work and the immediate reaction was fuck, why can't I do this? That was the first reaction. Then the second one was well, how does he do it so I can copy it? Both of which are almost negative emotional reactions. But once I kind of realized that, okay, that's not going to help me in any respect, and just be pleased that there are so many incredible artists out there bringing beauty to the world right, it's a difficult thing to, I guess, respect Okay, well, you just stated exactly my reaction to your work this morning.

Gigi de Manio:

I was doing that, saying that to my husband. I was like fuck, you should see his work, it's gorgeous. And I was like a picture of hands or the portrait or I don't know. Everything you do. I'm like. I just I feel like in my work and the wedding work it's it moves so quickly. I wish I could just like bring it down a notch and just like take a little more time to capture. I mean, I have no idea how you work. I don't know how much time you take to do an image like that.

Matt Jacob:

So yeah, too long, but um, it's okay I mean, I've read a lot about you.

Matt Jacob:

Well, yeah, I mean it's, it's a work in progress. I'm I'm trying really, really hard to to work on my storytelling technique, which is, I think, the the for me and my niche. Um, because I I don't do much commercial work, so I'm very privileged in the fact that I can do what I want most of the time with photography, with the images and with photography. That may change in the future, but I hope it doesn't. So I I get the luxury of of having that time and chilling out, but I really now I'm trying to challenge myself this year and being better at focusing on one or two big stories that mean, that mean a lot to me, and then figuring out how to tell that story through through just images, right? So, um, yeah, I think, um, yeah, and look, this isn't about me, this is about you.

Gigi de Manio:

Let's let's, let's exchange.

Matt Jacob:

I appreciate it's awkward's, awkward, okay, no, yeah, I used to rely a lot on not rely, but I used to use artificial light a lot.

Matt Jacob:

I found there was a unique opportunity to take a light in a softbox away on location to weird and wonderful destinations, which logistically was always really difficult and expensive you know, lugging a load of gear around but I felt added a added some kind of originality element to to my work and then I started using it less and less and my my focus when I'm shooting people is way more on and this is what I want to ask you a lot about it's way more in the connection with the people, because the technical side of things, I've spent years getting to a point where I'm happy with the aesthetic and just lighting.

Matt Jacob:

I love lighting, I love everything about it and I want the lighting to enhance the story and the visuals as much as possible. Most futile if you don't, especially in portraits, if you don't have, if I don't have, someone in front of me that A wants to be there, that connects with me, that is willing to kind of help tell this story with me. So I think that's where I've fallen down a lot historically, because I was focused way more on like it looking beautiful. So now, yeah, I can still. I can do that a little bit quicker now because I know myself and I know my process a bit more. But yeah, now it's more the real challenge of creating art out of it like meaningful, impactful art.

Gigi de Manio:

So, um, well, you do, you're right. I mean, it is trying to create that connection is the key for what I for, to what I do, and, um, I do wish I had more time to slow down, but it it the nature of what I'm doing. It's a wedding day, it's somebody's story, it's not a photo shoot, and I have to keep that in mind as I'm working. And so how do you create this connection? How do you, um, capture these moments where they I hate to use this authentic word, but yes, it's true how do you? How does it feel genuinely true? And, um, and it's really about getting to you have to sort of vet your client ahead of time, Like you have to figure out who are they, what, what makes them tick, what do they love about each other, who are the important people in their lives? Um, you know, when all is said and done, what pictures are important to you, what pictures of who do you want to have a picture taken with that? If you know you didn't get that picture, you'd be so bumming. So I need to know all of that ahead of time, and you know I like to know little things. How did they meet? Are there any special details that have been woven into the wedding that are personal to them. I mean, even if it's something that they have at their place setting, it's a little detail or I don't know. It's like. You know, somebody else may just pass by it, but they put a lot of thought into that. So, you know, I'm always looking for these little clues as to what is going to be important to them when, because I am telling a story. So everything I'm looking at has a reason for being there the people, they chose the details, they chose the colors, they chose the place. So there's a reason. Everything is happening and they didn't just throw it together and they're spending an awful lot of money. So you know, there's a reason why all these is very intentional.

Gigi de Manio:

And so, you know and I'm not only photographing images for the couple, I'm also working with florists and planners and even the person who made the invitation, who put a lot of thought and time into it. So everybody says, you know, comes up to me, did you get? Did you get, did you get a picture of? I'm like, yeah, I've got it. But as I'm shooting, I'm having to constantly think that literally everything I'm passing by, someone touched, someone put their hands on it the lighting, the flowers, the dress, the shoes, I mean everything. And so, at the end of it all, I'm sort of the gatekeeper of, you know, the record of this historical day, and people always come can I have images of that. So in the end, you know, we all have our memories, but the photos are the only thing left to document it all.

Gigi de Manio:

And so I am photographing different things for different reasons. Some of it is just to keep a record of what happened. Some of it is I really want to tell the emotional story and record everybody who's there. I've taken many, many times I've taken the last photo of somebody in the family and you know it's a weighty thing, you feel it and it's an important day and a lot of um. Everybody comes from all around to be there to support you. And so it's like I'm I'm telling somebody's personal story, their history, and I feel that pressure when I'm shooting the whole story. So I'm realizing, like everything I'm looking at, I am feeling I need to record it. So, anyway, I'm rambling, but um no, that's.

Matt Jacob:

I have so many questions from that. Um, how do you, what is you take? Take one, I mean first of all, how many weddings do you do roughly a year?

Gigi de Manio:

um roughly, I'd say average about 15 to 18, so not a ton um, but a lot of them are multiple days. There'll be travel involved, so it is a big commitment, and I'll have multiple photographers, so there's a lot of images to get through when we're all finished so, yeah, how you know on a, on a, on a normal wedding event.

Matt Jacob:

Obviously they're all different, but if your process is understanding that this takes time, and how much work do you put into the pre-production in terms of getting to know them? Because you know, obviously like a week before the wedding or a month before the wedding, they're already starting to, you know, think about it, maybe get nervous, maybe not really give photography much attention if you're doing it ahead of time and I'll just do it on the day, kind of thing, or am I way off the mark? There? Is that kind of realistic? How much time do you give to them beforehand?

Gigi de Manio:

Well, it's different for everybody. So I'd say the higher profile weddings. I don't have as much personal time with them one-on-one. A lot of times, if it's a celebrity client, for instance, I am very much kept at a distance because they're not to be bothered and everything goes through the event planner. So I'm sort of hounding the planner. But you also don't want to be a pain in the ass either.

Gigi de Manio:

They're busy and they look at me like look, you're professional, you know what you're doing, do your job. And sometimes I'll say, okay, I get that. But in order to do my job really well, I need to know a little bit about them. How do they meet? So I do usually at least get to meet them initially, establish a connection, make sure you know they like me. I mean, it's not just the work, because I'm going to be with them for a couple days. So do they like my work? But on top of that, can they handle hanging around me for a few days? So there is that too.

Gigi de Manio:

So you know, we get to know each other through that initial meeting and then I'm just pretty upfront. I'll say listen, you guys, I want to shoot everything that's important to you and I am not being nosy, but please tell me anything that you're comfortable sharing. You know, is there anything I need to be aware of, like are there any sort of dicey feeling situations or like, and they'll be like, oh yeah, okay, let me tell you so that we don't have to somehow wait, wait, no, come on, you've got to give us, you've got to give us a story, you've got to give us an example well, just like okay what would be the, what would be the worst situation you've been thrown into as a wedding photographer?

Gigi de Manio:

well, I'm just like dicey situations where you might have like very, not very happy divorced parents that now have new partners and then everybody's coming together and you're doing the family picture. So how do we get the dad without the new wife you know in the shot? Keep everybody happy? It's, it's tricky. So sometimes we put the new wife on the end and we crop her out later.

Gigi de Manio:

So it's just like you have to figure it brilliant I bet you gotta have her in there because he wants that picture. So you're working with a lot and sometimes I don't even know these. Sometimes I don't get these details in the day out, but I get the look and I'm like, okay, you're reading situations constantly and picking up on people's energies and trying to figure out. Okay, this is a little tense here. I need to figure out what to do and so you have to be bold. But you just have to read the room. You have to know when to insert yourself and when to step out. So, yeah, it's a tricky situation sometimes and it's not just the couple and the mother, the bride and the parents. Sometimes you know the planners are, you know, in a really stressful situation and they might get uptight and you just have to let it's just like, you just gotta roll with it. So it's a lot of managing personalities and real and don't take it personally.

Matt Jacob:

Just sort of read the room and figure out what's going on and that's actually that's such a skill to to really imbue in the in the experience of being a wedding photographer. It's. It's not everyone has that right. You, you might be able to learn it with experience, but you did, did your because you have a degree in psychology, if I'm, if I'm, corrected, how much did that play in having having education around the mind and and people, and how, how different people work?

Gigi de Manio:

it definitely helped, for sure, it opened my mind up to all of that. But also, you know, I've been doing this for 25 years just living life. Life too, you know. I mean we're constantly learning how to work with people and I have three kids. I mean that was quite the education. So you know. And I'm married, so you know like we're getting a lot of education.

Gigi de Manio:

Yeah, I mean life in general. Yeah, I mean life in general if you're open to it. The thing is the trick for shooting weddings. This might sound so cliche and corny, but you really do. Just have to arrive with an open heart. You just have to look at the scene and observe the different people and what they might be feeling and take it in, and you know it. Know, it bugs me. People are always asked oh, have you, have you ever shot an unattractive bride? It's like people are just sort of want the dirt and the thing is, you know, like no, not, I don't know. I don't see it that way. I go in with the attitude that everybody's beautiful and until they prove me otherwise, I'm going to believe that they are beautiful. And I feel like, especially on their wedding day, you are looking for the good, you're looking for the hope, and a wedding day is all about hope. You know everyone there is well. Hopefully they're all there to support you and hope that this union works out, you know.

Matt Jacob:

So next question um, have you ever shot an unattractive bride? Um, no, you you talked a little bit about that, about looking for, for certain stuff. Give me, um, a high level overview about you. Know, if you're going in with an open mind, you don't want to be scattered all over the place, right? Obviously you might have a team with you and maybe some assistants, I guess, but what are you, as, as the photographer, where are those?

Matt Jacob:

And we talked a little bit about this before we kind of got into things but where are those moments of stillness that you can really kind of focus on? Okay, what am I for here? That's going to be really special, really intimate and really kind of be meaningful and powerful, rather than, obviously, you're going to get the normal family shots and the status quo of what you expect or what the bride and groom probably expect they want. But if I look at your work, you really do spend a lot of effort and time capturing those really immutable moments in between, in between kind of the, the, the staged moments you have at a wedding. Right, is that really a conscious effort to to go and do that which separates you from others? Maybe?

Gigi de Manio:

it is um and so at. So there's, there are so many things going through my brain as I'm photographing a wedding, and it is a conscious effort, all right. Well, I'm sorry, I'm going to back up. So before I do a wedding, I really I like to get there beforehand. I like to scout the space, I like to sit there and just be in it and feel it and visualize how everything is going to happen, where the bride and groom are getting ready, where they're going to go from there. I like to have a whole plan.

Gigi de Manio:

It's like being an athlete you sort of visualize your routine or what you're doing and you picture yourself doing it, so that you can go down that route and that route and do all the images you have in your head. Most likely, they're not always going to happen that way, so you come up with a plan A, b and C. Okay, well, if they move this way, what are we going to do? If I go that way and you just mentally get ready so that you have your big picture, you have your bullet points. Okay, well, I'm going to go from here to here, to here to here, Okay, so you have those moments that you think, okay, these are going to be um important shots, say, for getting ready. You know, the mom comes in, the dad comes in for the reveal of seeing the bride in her dress and then, um, you followed by um her putting um, her walking out for the first look and seeing the groom. So that's another. But what about the moment when, um, she sees him? He hasn't turned around yet. You know, it's like you're. You know there are all these in-between moments that are going to happen and they may be winners, they may not, but you have to be ready for it. And there's, you know, my heart is still pounding every time I shoot these weddings. It's like I've been doing this for so long and I think it's it's.

Gigi de Manio:

It is stressful and I think that's part of why I you're really alert, you're on, you're like antennae are up and you're looking for everything that could possibly happen and the interactions that are going to occur in these moments of connection. So the moments of quiet, for instance, are like when the bride a lot of times now, they give each other gifts, wedding gifts and or a letter, and so that's a nice moment. Sometimes, you know, it's really joyful, sometimes it's teary, sometimes it's emotional, you don't know what you're going to get. But you do, I do have to kind of set the scene a little bit and get a nice spot for the bride or groom to be reading their letter and then up, and then it happens. I can't.

Gigi de Manio:

I don't want it to be so choreographed that I'm like you know, okay, well, look this way, and like you know, it's, it's got a, it's just has to be, it has to be real. So, um, you know, there's a little bit of luck in if that Matt, if that moment is going to feel magical. Um, but then in the say for the first dance, you know, don't know if I'm going to get that sort of real, intimate connection. I hope I do. Sometimes they're so stiff it's just not going to happen, can't force it, and other times they're just, they are naturally connected. I'm like, oh my God, I have so many I don't know which one to choose. So it's a little bit of preparation and a little bit of luck to get those moments of stillness, connection, something that feels quiet, I guess, reflective. I love those moments.

Matt Jacob:

What keeps you coming back for more? Why do you do it? You've been doing it for so long. Where does the passion come from?

Gigi de Manio:

I'm a romantic, I am totally a romantic. I just love a love story. I am a total geek for that. I just, yeah, I, I love a love story and um, yeah, you know, I, just I, I feel like love is the one thing. It's so essential to our human existence. I feel like everybody you know either longs for it, um, they want it. It doesn't matter who you are, what gender you are, what, where you're from, what culture. I mean, as humans, we all have this need to be loved and or we want to love, and so it's an incredible story, like, how do these people come together? And I feel the importance that I have to record this story because when I first started out in photography, it was really I went down the road of commercial.

Gigi de Manio:

I went down the road of commercial and I was, I was an assistant in New York and I worked in fashion studios and with fashion photographers and I don't know. I sort of for, after about seven years of assisting, I just thought, yeah, I'm not feeling it Like. I just wasn't feeling important to me. I needed this. Who cares? And I needed to feel like I was recording something that meant something to somebody. And my twin sister was getting married and as a gift to her, I just thought, well, I'm going to shoot a couple roles. And it was this aha moment, like when I printed them and I gave her a book, and she was so excited and it was the most rewarding thing I had done up to that point and I thought, okay, I wasn't expecting that.

Gigi de Manio:

I mean always had such a didn't have a lot of respect for wedding photographers. I mean, in general at that time, wedding photographers were pretty low on the totem pole of respect. I mean it was very contrived, cheesy, pretty awful stuff. I mean it wasn't that, it wasn't that interesting. There wasn't this drive, it wasn't photojournalistic in this drive to capture emotion, it was more staged and formal and I just thought, you know, doesn't have to be like that.

Gigi de Manio:

This is an incredible day and it incorporates everything that I had learned up to that point. You know, it's got portraiture, documentary, product architecture, fashion, editorial, it is formal, family pictures, it is all there and you have to capture all of it and you don't get a lot of chance to say wait a minute, can I go back and do that again? It's moving so quickly, so you just have to go boom, boom, boom, boom and you're. The reason for taking different pictures is different, for you know, I have so many different reasons for taking a certain picture. So there are a lot of boxes I need to check off and make a lot of people happy, and the body of work in the end of it is a beautiful story and it means something and it's not going to get tossed in the trash. It's going to be kept for generations and shared.

Gigi de Manio:

So it felt incredibly rewarding and it was just like okay, this is what I want to do. It felt incredibly rewarding and it was just like, okay, this is what I want to do. So I just went. I just started shooting weddings. I shot my those roles of film for my twin sister. She was working for Delta at the time as a flight attendant. She took her book to work and instantly I had like five new brides. They're like oh my God, this is I want to. I want her to shoot my wedding. This is completely different than anything I've seen, and so it just took off from there. So I never assisted other photographers doing weddings. I just did it the way I thought it should be done and, um, tell the story, just do it. So it went from there.

Matt Jacob:

Incredible. What a what a steep learning curve. I guess During that learning curve of jumping straight into the deep end, did you find any? Did you have any bad experiences? Did you have any negative feedback during that learning process with weddings? Because I just think of the pressure. I mean I couldn't do it. I'd just be up all night and sweating because it's so much pressure. I feel it for you, the fact that you still feel that every wedding is kind of humbling because you've been doing it for long enough, but it's one day, it's hopefully one couple's wedding in their life and it's the most special recording that they can have. So when you were starting out, did you have any of the opposite experience where people weren't too happy?

Gigi de Manio:

I don't mean to sound arrogant, but not to my knowledge.

Matt Jacob:

Brilliant, but it's, you know, it sounds like you. You, uh, you knew photography so well. Anyway, then, right, you'd been doing it for for long enough. You had. You'd come from an analog background. Um, so you, you knew photography inside and out. It was just a matter of tailoring that for for weddings, which sounds like it was perfectly natural for you.

Gigi de Manio:

Exactly, I started shooting weddings with Hasselblad two and a quarter and yeah, I know. So it was like, do you? Still have it I do yeah, it's in the closet downstairs.

Matt Jacob:

Do you still shoot any analog or get into the darkroom?

Gigi de Manio:

I love no digital all the way and for so many reasons, but I did like the film. I mean I do love the square format, but it was definitely. I have so much more freedom with digital and I just love it. But when I was shooting with the Hasselblad, yeah, my assistant was there. She was not a second shooter or he, he would just be there. She was not a second shooter or he, he would just be there to. I'd say black and white, no color. So I would literally take the dark slide, you know, put it in the film back, hand it over and they'd give me the other back with a color of black and white. So I would have to decide ahead of time this feels like a black and white moment or this feels like a color moment. So you know, some people, how would you decide that?

Gigi de Manio:

I think so. For instance, like if I was photographing a father, the bride and the bride doing the father daughter dance, somehow to me that feels black and white. Somehow to me that feels black and white. I want to whenever I feel like there's I'm recording connection and emotion, that that feels timeless and something that really, I guess when I'd say, I'd say, when I'm really trying to express moments of love, I feel that feels black and white to me, whereas if I'm shooting a party shot, like a dancing shot, celebration, that feels like color to me. I mean, it can be black and white too.

Gigi de Manio:

I actually do have one of my all-time favorite shots is black and white and it's with everyone singing around the table and it's when you know the old tradition of when the bride and groom, when everyone would like the bride and groom to kiss at the table, they would clank their glasses and be like, hey, everybody, you bride and groom kiss. And they said, ok, we'll kiss, but you can't. We're not going to do it that way. If you want us to kiss your table has to come to our table and sing a song with the word love in it. So I have this fabulous image where two tables came to the bride and groom's couple table and they're all singing a song with the word love in it. So there's all this energy and commotion, but I shot it in black and white and it has this real, timeless quality to it To this day. It's one of the first weddings I ever did. It's still one of my favorite shots, and that's.

Matt Jacob:

I think black and white can do that.

Matt Jacob:

Yeah, well, there's definitely a timeless aspect to black and white, as well as taking any kind of color distraction out of it. So you can, you know, certainly, like you said, those more, those deeper emotional moments, that really, really stands out. I think a lot of people may not know how to use black and white these days. I, I knew, I didn't know, I always used to think it was cheaty if you couldn't do, if you didn't know color theory. But actually using it, well, it can be extremely powerful. But you know, harping back to those old days, we'd have to choose ahead of time. It's very nostalgic and you know, it's almost.

Matt Jacob:

I don't know if photography would be better off if we kind of slowed it down like that more, but I think in your arena with wedding photography, the more you can get and the easier it can be, then the better.

Matt Jacob:

Right, you don't want to be holding people up or holding yourself up, when you think about timelessness and when you think about the telling images that you want to get. How do you keep innovating that kind of creativity? How do you go into each wedding with a fresh mind and with the idea that, okay, well, I have to serve the client, but also I want to do something that's not necessarily a little bit different, but make sure I capture those different moments. Does that come into your process?

Gigi de Manio:

Yeah, it does, because you know you want to keep it fresh, you want to feel energized and motivated, and you want to. I'm constantly learning. I've never, never to this day, feel like I've got it, I'm done, you know, like I know every I know, and that's the beauty of photography is that you're constantly and pushing yourself. I mean, if you're invested in it, you are pushing yourself. You want to try something new, new and I think once I get comfortable with a certain way of doing things, it's like, okay, cool, I got that and that. So then I I try, I take chances, and that's one of the beauties of working with digital that it allows me to do that. You know, I can really drag the shutter. Or you know, I just I want to, as much as I can, pull in the ambient light and all these beautiful colors that they have going on and combine that with, you know, still making the couple look great. So how do I do that? And so I play around a lot making the couple look great. So how do I do that? And so I play around a lot. I do.

Gigi de Manio:

I do push myself to see new things, see things differently and honestly, you know, seeing your work, that I mean, it makes me think. You know, it's like you look at other people's work that you're inspired by and I may pick something up from you know, looking at some of your images and think, gosh, and I was doing that this morning Like what, what can I do? How can I incorporate some of this feeling that I get from looking at your work? How can I pull that into what I do? And you know, I somehow I'm thinking to myself can I slow things down? Can I take a little bit more time and try and do something like this, so like what I see in your work? And I don't know, sometimes I can, sometimes I can't. There's always such a tight timeline and it's frustrating. So you, there's only so much you can do.

Matt Jacob:

But at least it's in my brain, you know, and I'm thinking about it, so you get motivated to try it I think, being aware of, aware of that and yeah, like you said, just uh, just just knowing that you want to try each time to do something different or have a specific concept in mind, and it may not work right, and that's the process of, like you said, learning all the time and making mistakes.

Matt Jacob:

Or the biggest thing that haunts me is if I don't try something right. And I mean with weddings I can only imagine, because time is so tight, it's so easy to get drawn into what I capture as much as possible, and often it's when you kind of take a step back, I imagine. I mean, I hear from you, but imagine if you just take a breath, take a step back, and that power of observation is worth a lot more than just spraying and praying, I guess.

Gigi de Manio:

Exactly. And there are times when it's a long day too, so you can get tired and you can start to just phone it in. And if I ever feel myself doing that, I do step away and I take literally it's like I'm shooting for, sometimes for 12, 14 hours. So it's like, okay, I can afford to take a 10 minute break and look away. And I always find that when I do that and I come back I'm like, oh my gosh, I didn't see that before. Or even if I lean down to my camera bag for a minute and just take a breath, and then I look up, I see things differently and I notice things I didn't see before.

Gigi de Manio:

So it is just about reminding yourself to pause for a little bit and slow down or throw on a different lens, just try anything to start to see things a little differently, and it gets exciting again. You know, sometimes the energy is not there and you know if the crowd, if the couple, if what you see in front of you is not grabbing you that's the scary thing. It's like, oh God, what am I going to do? I've got to figure out something. I cannot leave the wedding without knowing that I gave it my full-on best. Like you know, I got it like okay, time to dig deep here, find something, put on a different lens or try a different light I don't know anything. Try a different perspective, so anything that can get me excited. So it is a challenge sometimes. It doesn't always come so easily, to be honest and so why the is?

Matt Jacob:

is that part of the reason you do 15 weddings a year? Is I mean that seems quite low, but I I don't. I've spoken to other wedding photographers and they yeah, no, I have no interest in that. Okay, that's all I wanted to hear. Well, I imagine I think I would be the same, Like I want to give my 100%, all to one wedding a month, or one wedding every couple of weeks, right yeah. And be the best version of myself for that specific wedding, rather than it feel like a job almost.

Gigi de Manio:

Yeah, no, I have no interest in doing like even 35 a year. No thanks, um. And you know I I was very intentional about that and and the way to do that is you raise your prices and you, you know you get fewer people that want to do it. So I was like, okay, that works for me. You know, charge more, shoot less. And you know, and the thing is is that you know if you're shooting 15 to 18, but there are, they are multiple days and there's travel involved. And you know, and the thing is is that you know if you're shooting 15 to 18, but there are, they are multiple days and there's travel involved, and you know, there there's a lot of post-production. It's not just that one day of the year, you know you're, it's not just 15 work days you've got, there's a whole lot attached to that work day. So, um, it ends up, yeah it, yeah they're very it's a week each right.

Gigi de Manio:

Yeah, oh, at least yeah. And even for the post-production you can add on a bunch, because I do albums too. So it's a lot. It is a lot of work and there's prep too, you know, managing the whole thing and talking to the event planner and figuring out the itinerary, and there's a lot of planning going on too. So, yeah, plenty of flights and all of that if I was a?

Matt Jacob:

if I was a, yeah, I mean, I, I could. I mean I can only imagine people. Some people think you just turn up to the wedding and shoot, right, but it's, it's a whole pre, pre, the pre-production, post-production, is is 90 of it and the the day itself is, you know, it's yeah, if I was a wannabe wedding photographer right now and talking to you what would be kind of two or three bits of advice you know over so many years of doing it, um, just general bits of advice that you would, you would give me oh boy, um, really, it just has to be something that really speaks to you.

Gigi de Manio:

It's, it's, it is a hard day, it's not, it's not something you just phone in. Um, it really has has to be something that you're you're thinking, yeah, I mean, I don't know. The subject matter really has to speak to you. I mean I know a lot of people are like, oh my God, there's no way I would do a wedding, no thanks. And for me I'm thinking, well, there's no way I'd really want to be a product shooter I mean, it's just, it has to, you know or an architectural shooter, even though I do some of that with my wedding work. But it's like a boom and I'm done. So I don't know and, um, I don't know. That's probably the obvious answer. Does it speak to you? Are you passionate about the subject matter? But, in order to get started, I'm trying to think how did I? Well, I photographed my sister's wedding and then it was spread by word of mouth.

Gigi de Manio:

But a lot of people ask me how do you get into the luxury market of shooting weddings? And that would be more so with working with event planners. So when I first started, it wasn't really, it was a very different business then I mean I started basically right when the internet was just coming out and websites. I mean it was all very new. And now there are so many opportunities to connect to event planners who are planning these fabulous weddings. So much of it is about connecting to people and creating your network of people who can work with you to do these events.

Gigi de Manio:

So I don't know, I mean, find people who you respect planners, florists start talking to people in the business whose work you like and start making connections. And you know that can be like, hey, I'll work with you. I'm not saying, do it all for free, but a little bit of like hey, I can do this for you if you want to. It's all about establishing relationships. I can do this for you if you want to. It's all about establishing relationships. So, and there are so many talented photographers out there doing weddings and other things but how do you make yourself stand out? It's hard, it's really tough. So I think it really comes down to forming relationships, and you know I go to conferences and networking opportunities. So it's not something that I'm. You know I can stop doing. You're constantly building these relationships with people.

Matt Jacob:

Yeah, I think what I get from those answers you just gave is you've got to be a people person and you've got to. You've got to understand really why you want to be a wedding photographer. I mean, it's easy to say I want to be a wedding photographer, but ask yourself honestly if you can honestly say you know, like in your case you, you love it so much because you love, love and uh, you know then people might have different reasons.

Matt Jacob:

But at least be honest with yourself about why you want to do it, because otherwise you won't a necessarily do a good job and b do it for that long.

Matt Jacob:

So that's right, absolutely it's difficult, it is well, you know, it's great to uh, to see someone who's done it successfully for for so long. I mean, um, what an inspiration Outside of wedding photography. I mean, you obviously have a family and you have other interests, I'm sure. What else do you do with photography, if anything? You talk about conferences. Do you do any teaching? You obviously print some stuff. Do you do publications in other outlets?

Gigi de Manio:

Well, I go to conferences, um, there is one that I just absolutely love. It's called engage and it is for the luxury wedding market, um, and they have multiple events throughout the year, four to five, and um, I've done speaking engages there. I've also been on the photography team that is there to tell the story of Engage so that they can use it for marketing, and that is actually a place where you know a lot of photographers. We all go and we talk shop and we talk about what motivates us and what cameras are you using now and what new equipment, and you know we all compete against each other at the same time, but in this place, no one cares about that. We just we're friends and we support each other and it's you know.

Gigi de Manio:

I come back to my studio and I'm in my, my space and it's just me, um, but my, my community. I have a wide net of planners, florists you know all these creative people that are involved in the wedding industry and um, we're all spread throughout the country and the world and we all motivate each other. We're a great support system for each other. So we've come together at these conferences and that's fantastic. It's wonderful. So I feel really lucky to be a part of that, and then other outlets. I mean I put together a book this past September. I just launched a 25-year retrospective of all of my favorite wedding images retrospective of all of my favorite wedding images and it's a book called silver to um commemorate the you give each other, uh, silver, something silver on your 25th anniversary. So it's called silver moments into memories and that was a really fun project available on amazon now yes, exactly available on amazon.

Gigi de Manio:

So, um, yeah, I got my little plug in there. Thank you, matt. Um, so, yeah, so that was a great project to do and a nice time to reflect and look back at all the work that I've done it to this point. And you know, when I was younger, I I really loved life magazine and know Life magazine was just about photos. It was really. I just remember looking at them and getting lost in the images, and that's the power of photography. It's just you can look at it once and then go back and look at it again and feel something different or notice something different, and it just makes you stop and look and reflect. And you know, it was really.

Gigi de Manio:

It was a great experience to go back and relive all of these weddings that I've done over 25 years. And and you know why I chose different images, there are different reasons for choosing all of them. They spoke to me and for one reason or another, and that's why they're included. So it truly is just a picture book. It's just an opportunity to get lost in these images and feel something. And that's what I think is the most important and that is my biggest goal when I photograph something, when I take an image is I just want the viewer to feel something, whether a moment of connection or reflection, or love or joy. It's a powerful thing to be able to do that.

Matt Jacob:

How do you do that with with weddings, when it's so personal to the bride and groom? Do you find there's it's even more difficult to make external audience members, such as me. If I'm looking at your photos of some people I don't know right, how do you does that come into your brain?

Gigi de Manio:

No, I either think you know one image may speak to you or it may not, but it might speak to somebody else, and I think it's. Can you relate to it? If you see something happening in a picture, can you feel that? Can you imagine yourself feeling that too? And if you can, then cool, I did what I wanted to do, made you feel something, even if it stirs up something that was like ooh, awkward, uncomfortable, whatever.

Gigi de Manio:

It's generally not what I'm going for in a wedding, but yeah, that's the beauty of art too. Um, yeah, I just, you know, that's, that's the beauty of art too. It's like you can't please everybody, you just can't. And so I, when I'm shooting, I find that a lot of times. I try not to think too much, I just want to feel it, and if I'm really caught up in what I'm feeling and what you know, and I can connect to what's in front of me, then I feel like somebody else is going to too, but I don't really care, I'm not thinking about that, I'm just shooting it because I'm feeling it, and usually those moments resonate for somebody else too.

Matt Jacob:

Tell me more about the book. What sparked it initially? Was it a feeling of a desire to leave a legacy or just to kind of be a little bit nostalgic?

Gigi de Manio:

well, I'll be really honest. It was my husband's idea and he pushed me to do this, like probably after I was in the business for 10 years. I'm like no way. Then 15, like nope. And he kept saying, geez, we gotta, you gotta do this. Um, I'm like who cares? Like no one in a little bit of for what you just touched on. I was like, well, why don't I create a book of images that other, of other people's weddings? Like who would enjoy that? And then it became 25 years and he said I know I got it. Why don't we't we call it silver? He was always pushing me to do this. So I'm like, oh, okay, that's cool, I can get into that idea and you know. Then he goes on. He's like you know, because so when you're dead, you know your kids will have something to remember, okay you had me at the title.

Gigi de Manio:

You didn't need to go that far, I mean. So he's like, well, you need a body of work. He's like, when the website is down, it's gone, like, why don't you just have? You need to have something to show your work. I'm like, okay, cool, all right, let's do it. So he was really instrumental in helping me make it happen. So that was really fun and, yeah, I'm proud of it. It's a good collection and it's personal to me.

Gigi de Manio:

So, yes, they are other people's weddings, but when I look at the imagers, I see moments. I remember certain situations. For instance, the bride and groom are just about to come down the stairs exiting the church, and you've got everybody lining up on both sides of the stairs exiting the church. And you've got everybody lining up on both sides of the um the stairs and they're getting ready to do the big confetti. You know, boom, like the rose petals, and the bride and groom are going to walk through them.

Gigi de Manio:

And I'm looking around. I'm thinking, oh my God, which idiot is going to be the one that's going to jump in the middle of the stairs with their iPhone and get the shot? And I knew it. I was like, oh, there he is, and I found the guy and he was getting ready to get into the stairs and I'm all the way at the bottom of the stairs, okay, so they're gonna come down the stairs to me, and so I have to run halfway up and the bride and groom are at the top. They're ready to descend the stairs, so I have to run halfway up.

Gigi de Manio:

Tell the guy politely could you please move aside, get the. Could you please move aside, get the fuck out of the way? Get the fuck out of the way. That's what I wanted to say, yeah and um. And then he's like, looking back at me like what? And I'm like, thank you, please move over. And then I have to run back down backwards and you know, still shooting oh my god, it was, it's scary and so I got the shot you got the shot I got the shot and so, yes, that image is in the book because, personally, it was a victory for me and, on top of that, it was a good one.

Gigi de Manio:

I really liked it and it shows the joy and it's the celebration, so, anyway, so, yeah, there are some moments of victory for me where I actually captured what I wanted. Moments of victory for me where I actually captured what I wanted and yeah, so, yeah, you always get the, the aunt in the red dress standing in the middle of the aisle with the iPad. I'm like, really, really, yeah, Everyone has a.

Matt Jacob:

everyone has a camera these days, right?

Gigi de Manio:

Unbelievable.

Matt Jacob:

Yes, they do, yeahhuh how do you see the, the future of of your work, but more importantly, the future of of wedding photography and even wider, in photography in general, when we understand that everyone's got a camera and ai is coming about and there's more saturation and competition than ever is? Do you care? Do is it? Is that something you really give much attention to?

Gigi de Manio:

no, I don't. I mean it is what we do. There is an art to it and it takes a lot of practice. I mean think how many hours we've spent taking pictures and looking through a lens and composite, composing and framing, like you know, you're, you're the, the ones for on the iPhone and I'm not saying that people on the iPhone are not talented. I mean there are a lot of really great shooters but as a whole, um, I don't think it's going to replace what I bring to the wedding the day of the wedding, and I mean I have to believe that, otherwise I might as well just quit.

Gigi de Manio:

But you know, it's interesting when you think about it. Like when we take pictures, what we're recording is truly everything is like what we're feeling, what's coming through our eyes. It's so personal. It's like you know there are 100 people looking at this scene, but what's recorded is what you decide, what I decide to frame that moment, to press the shutter, what tells us to do that, and so it's so incredibly personal and it is an interesting thing to see the body of work when we're all done. We photographed a wedding story. This was everything that I was feeling, what I was seeing, and hopefully it speaks to the bride and groom and reminds them of what they were feeling. And that's what I really want in the end is, when I present my work to them, I want to remind them what they were feeling in that moment, even though it's sort of a record of what I was feeling, because I shot it and it's all coming through my lens, my eyes, I don't know.

Matt Jacob:

That's a great way of, that's a really wonderful way of explaining it, and I'm glad you touched on that because I want to do full circle now to, I think, one of the first photographs you ever took, that of your friend. This was a four word in your book, so I'm doing a complete disservice, I think, but that that moment in the dark room when you saw the magic of this portrait that you took of your friend in college or yes or a family member or something, and you, you understood that, wow, this really was a fraction of a second, of a moment that can never happen again, and capturing this young lady.

Matt Jacob:

I don't know why. I'm telling it. You tell me the story.

Gigi de Manio:

You're doing a great job.

Matt Jacob:

There's a romance to it, so yeah please tell me.

Gigi de Manio:

Well, thank you, I'm glad you remembered, which means that it spoke to you. But, um, yes, so this was. I was a, um, a psychology major in college and it was my senior year. And they said, okay, you're ready to graduate, but not really, because you have not finished your art requirement. And I was like, oh my god, I'm not artistic, I don't know what to do. And they said, well, here are your choices, and photography was one of them. And so I like, okay, artistic, I don't know what to do. And they said, well, here are your choices, and photography was one of them. And so I was like, okay, I think I can do that. That sounds cool.

Gigi de Manio:

So I picked up a camera and one of our first assignments was to take a portrait of a friend. So I photographed my friend, liz, and then we went into the dark room and I'm, you know, in the developer, and then it was truly magic. I saw her face appear and it was. I'll never forget it. It's that moment just hit you and I was my. I was like, oh my gosh, this is so cool. It was, it was like magic. And I just remembered. I remember the shooting.

Gigi de Manio:

Taking the shot was a little bit awkward. It was difficult, it wasn't. It didn't flow so easily, but there was that split second where I got this moment and it was like I fell in love with that image and I thought, wow, we're all ready to graduate, we're 21. We're sort of like what's going to happen next? And I had just captured this moment in time. That will never happen again and there was a real power to that. I thought it was. I'm recording someone's history and it was fun because I reconnected with her this past September when the book came out and you know, she's basically the first portrait I'd ever taken and here she was, you know, coming to my book launch and she was there to support me. It was pretty great. Do you still?

Gigi de Manio:

have that photo I do yeah.

Matt Jacob:

I do, I have it. You're going to have to send me a copy okay well, if you don't mind, if liz doesn't mind I don't mind um, yeah, I'd love to.

Matt Jacob:

I'd love to see it okay yeah, what a wonderful story and it's such a privilege, isn't it to, to be part of that, um, especially with someone else. That's why I love portrait work and, well, taking photos of people, because it's a two-way thing and it's it's their space and you're capturing something in them, in those eyes. Um, that will will never happen again. They will never have that feeling. You'll never have that feeling. It's, it's such a once in a lifetime moment. That's uh, you know, it's extremely powerful as you.

Gigi de Manio:

I want to ask you a quick question, matt. How much time do you spend with your subjects before there's such a serenity and a quietness and a confidence, I mean there's such peace? I keep coming back to this word, peace, when I look at your work with your subjects, and how do you get them there, there, how do you get them to that space of comfort?

Matt Jacob:

well, yeah, I mean I'm glad you recognize that that's kind of what I'm going for. I love I love minimalism. I love negative space. I love peace. It's something a deep, burning desire in myself. It's or it's just a reflection of kind of who I want to be. I want more peace in my life. I enjoy just no one around and being in the comfort of my own environment in peace and quiet. So there's something deeply personal in that. But in terms of the process, I like to say that I spend a lot of time with them. It does vary depending on what project I'm on or if I'm maybe working for someone else or partnering with someone else, but in an ideal world I'll spend a week with people before I I get them in front of the camera wow in reality it's.

Matt Jacob:

In reality it's a day, uh, or a couple of days, um. But yeah, if, if I was to to draw out a perfect project, the first week would not be me picking up a camera. It would just be me engrossing myself in that environment with those people and allowing them to learn about me as much as me learning about them. But don't forget, there's a lot of photographs I don't publish. That didn't work right. That's the beauty of photography. We edit all the time. We edit with selections and there are many photographs.

Matt Jacob:

I didn't have that connection and I didn't put the time in to get to know them and to break the ice and just to be learn how to be empathetic towards them and what they're going through and what their life is like and etc. Etc. A lot of the people I photograph either haven't been photographed before or have rarely been photographed. So there's that whole thing of also getting them used to the camera, what it is and why I'm so interested in them. 90% of the time they don't understand why I am interested in them. There's not that connection to to reasoning that, um, you know, someone in the West might be so used to or not. So, yeah, there's a. There's a lot that goes into it. Um, I know, in reality, a lot of the times I do feel rushed and I wish I had more time with these people. Um, but I take, I take my time on shoots. I really just if I can.

Matt Jacob:

If I can come out of a week shooting with five images, I'm really happy that's great, and if it takes me two or three days to get that, then I'm more than happy to spend that time. I'll be frustrated, but I'm happy to to spend that time getting it.

Gigi de Manio:

Amazing, that's incredible.

Matt Jacob:

Well, thank you so much for joining me. Before we go, I do want to hear kind of what your movements are next, where people can find you, any more books coming out, how you see the next, yeah, gold. Wait, when's gold? Is that 50?

Gigi de Manio:

50. I'll be in my walker, I'll just be like, okay, click, yeah, I mean do you do.

Matt Jacob:

You see retirement as a thing, or because you love it, you just want to do it all the time.

Gigi de Manio:

I don't. I, I can't imagine retiring. I, I don't know. I mean I guess I'm gonna have to at some point. I don't want to. I, I, it's funny, I'm going to have to at some point. I don't want to. It's funny.

Gigi de Manio:

I mean I'm into this, you know, 25 years already and I literally can't get enough. I still feel new, I do. I feel like there are still so many people that I want to work with and places I want to travel. I love. I want to do more destination weddings. I really do. I mean, now that all my kids are out of the house, you know, once in college tour in New York or working, and so, yeah, I'm in my, my third act. Ok, what do I want to do now? And for me it's I want to travel and keep shooting weddings in the most amazing, beautiful places. Um, I love shooting landscapes too. So you know, my life is a little quieter now in that regard, um, and the fact that I'm not having to be a mom, you know, doing pickup and drop off still, and some I don't know how I did it.

Gigi de Manio:

I don't get it. I don't know how I did it incredible superhuman I somehow did it.

Gigi de Manio:

But I have an incredible husband who is amazing partner and all of that. We tag teamed it. So that was great, I'm lucky. But, um, I don't know what is next. Just keep going. I don't want to, I don't want to quit. I, I literally I'm not about. You know, if you were to say what's your, you know, five-year goal plan, whatever, I don't know, I, I don't do that. I live very much in the moment. It's just what I do.

Matt Jacob:

I probably should have a plan, but I don't no, I agree with you and I think it's quite common in with creators and and artists. Um, the amount of photographers I've spoken to and I'm the same I did. You know this. I don't have a five-year plan. I have some goals but I, you know, I don't kind of structure them into something so ornate. Where are your balls, matt? We don't have enough time. Podcast is one of them.

Matt Jacob:

I want to shoot more, definitely. Like you know, it's my number one love, and life often gets in the way. I don't do too much commercial stuff, so that's a blessing and a curse. If I did more commercial stuff, it would get me out there doing more, but podcast gets in the way. Other jobs gets in the way, life admin gets in the way. They're not all excuses, but I just want to shoot more.

Matt Jacob:

There's so many stories I want to tell and practice. I just want to shoot more. I want to do. There's so many stories I want to tell and practice it. I just want to be better all the time. I think that's the biggest goal and so many creatives' goals. You just said it as well. You know you. Just you feel new in it. Still, you want to keep learning. I know I can do better and I want to do better. One of my big goals actually is to do a book. You know I'm really envious of you and I'm super proud of what you've been able to achieve and so inspirational to you. Know anyone, any photographer, who creates a book, but certainly someone who's done it over 25 years?

Matt Jacob:

um, absolutely amazing so yeah that's a, that's a big goal of mine.

Gigi de Manio:

But well, you keep on rocking yeah, keep going, you would have it. You would have an incredible book. I'm waiting for that one to come out.

Matt Jacob:

Let me know all right, thank you. In the meantime, I hope next time in boston I'll I'll give you a shout and see if you're in town. We can grab a coffee I would love that.

Gigi de Manio:

Well, matt, thank you so much for inviting me on your podcast. This is such a pleasure to meet you and speak with you, love your work and I'm gonna to continue following you, for sure.

Matt Jacob:

Yeah, absolutely. The pleasure's all mine. Thank you so much for joining me and spend your evening online. And, yeah, keep on being in the moment, keep on doing incredible work and I'll keep a close eye on it.

Gigi de Manio:

Thank you, all right, thank you.

Matt Jacob:

Thanks Gigi.

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